11 on the d20. -1, because my Dexterity is terrible. 10 even.
…OK, good enough.
All right. So. I haven’t blogged in over three years. That’s a long time, even by my standards.
Quick catch-up: continued the struggle with major depressive disorder and general anxiety disorder, struggled with medication, struggled with university, struggled with writing, took a leave of absence because mental illness and tertiary learning don’t necessarily make the best partners, fell into a major depressive episode, found Critical Role, started back at therapy, was officially diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder, started playing D&D, clawed my way partly out of the depressive episode, and…that’s it. All caught up.
I’m working on dealing with the depression and anxiety, It’s actually a little bit easier, since I was officially diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder, and since I found Critical Role.
Critical Role is a live-stream where (in the immortal words of Matthew Mercer) “a bunch of nerdy-ass voice actors sit around, roll dice, and play Dungeons & Dragons.” Matt Mercer is the Dungeon Master, and Laura Bailey, Liam O’Brien, Marisha Ray, Sam Riegel, Taliesin Jaffe, and Travis Willingham play the characters that comprise the adventuring party known as Vox Machina, in the homebrew world of Exandria. It’s hosted by Geek and Sundry, and can be found on Alpha and Twitch.
I stumbled across Critical Role last year, in the midst of a depressive funk. 14 months later, and life seems to be a little bit easier. Critical Role and D&D have done a lot to reignite my creative spark. I started playing in August last year, and started to DM for myself a month or so later.
I’m now playing in a regular game as a half-elf cleric, and sporadically running two games: a campaign for a group of friends, and a campaign for three children (a 5-year-old girl and two boys, a 7-year-old boy and a 10-year-old). I’m also running a for-fun one-shot game at a convention this year, for a group of people I met through the Critter community.
Living is hard. Day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute, it’s hard. Thanks to the power of medication, I am no longer suicidal, but I’m still hollow sometimes, and anxious, and sad. But being creative, and having a community, helps a lot.
I’m going to start posting again here, as regularly as I can. I’ll mostly be sharing thoughts on Critical Role and D&D, social justice issues, writing, and mental health.
C xoxo
